Hard Time Moving On
by StanaTorv
Summary: He's lost her to another man and he's finding it hard to let her memory go.


**This is another Jameson Rook songfic challenge. I have another one that I was given too. This is a little angsty but it paints a certain character in a different light than you're used to. I hope that it's received well in this community.  
>I decided to write this instead of doing intensive study for my exam tomorrow. It's my Shakespeare final...last thing left to do before the end of the semester. I hope it's as easy as my history final one was.<br>Anyway, without further ado (see that...I used a Shakespearean word...I'm so going to pass now) I give you this oneshot. **

**Disclaimer: Not mine. **

**Dedicated to my friend Jess aka. Angel-junkie. My Olivia Dunham to her Charlie Francis. What would I do without you and our conversations that get fueled by autocorrect mistakes?**

**Hard Time Moving On**

He was numb; he didn't know how he felt anymore. Kate had made her choice and he was no longer apart of her intimate life. He told her that they should still be friends, but he wasn't sure how he would go with that. Every day he grew more and more detached from the world around him. Never had a woman made him feel this way; but Kate was _-is-_ special. To coin a phrase, 'she is extraordinary'. When he was around her he felt alove. He wanted to be a better man because of her. He always thought that he could do more.

_See I've been blistered_  
><em>By the neverending sunshine of your smile<em>  
><em>You know a memory like that will last a while<em>  
><em>But I had no idea that it'd take this long<em>  
><em>Or burn so strong<em>

_And every time that sun begins to set  
>Something in me cries out, 'no, not yet!'<em>_  
><em>

_See I woke up_  
><em>with a picture of you smiling in my head<em>  
><em>Instinctively I reached across the bed<em>  
><em>The empty place i found was smooth and cool<em>  
><em>Lonesome too<em>

Kate had still made her choice, but that didn't stop him from missing her. He picked up the phone that was sitting on the table beside his bed and dialled a familiar number. She picked up on the third ring.

"Beckett." Her voice was groggy from being woken up from her slumber.

"Hey. It's me," he replied. He was staring at his bedroom ceiling fan as it spun; cooling the room down in the harsh summer heat.

Kate sat up in bed and leaned her back against the headboard, trying not to disturb her sleeping partner. "What do you want?" She didn't mean for it to come out as harsh as it sounded.

He sighed. "I know it's kinda strange for me to call, seeing as we're broken up and all. But I had this sudden need to call you."

"What for?" she asked as she wiped the sleep from her eyes.

"You know how I said we should still be friends?"

Kate didn't know where this was conversation was headed, "Uh, yeah."

He continued, "I think we should reconsider that."

He was doing her head in, "Why?"

He got quiet. "Because I can't get you out of my head. Every thought, every memory is the same. I see you and I miss you."

Her heart went out to him; she didn't want to ever hurt him. Even though they had parted on amicable terms, she had inadvertantly made his life harder. "I'm sorry."

"It's ok, but can you tell me something that will make your memory go away? Make it cruel and make it strong, Kate. I can't keep living like this."

"Josh," she breathed, "I can't, I'm sorry. I know it's hard, but you will find someone who will love you and you will forget all about me." Kate wiped the lone tear that fell to her cheek with the palm of her hand.

"I hope so." He didn't believe her. "Tell Castle I'm sorry if I woke him up."

"You didn't." Kate looked down at the man lying beside her. She had found her true love. "He's a heavy sleeper."

"Good. I didn't want him to think that I was trying to steal you back. I was just having a hard time moving on."

"I know. And I truly am sorry, Josh."

"Yeah." He sounded defeated. "I'll see you around, Kate. Be happy."

Kate smiled; she was happy. "You too, Josh. Goodnight."

They both hung up their phones and they each prepared to go back to sleep; one alone and one curled up with her lover and best friend.

* * *

><p><strong>Lyrics for 'Hard Time Movin' On' by David Bradley<strong>

_HEY IT'S ME  
>IT KNOW ITS KINDA STRANGE FOR ME TO CALL<br>GIVEN THAT WE'RE BROKEN UP AND ALL  
>BUT I COULD THINK OF NOTHING ELSE TO DO<br>SO I CALLED YOU_

SEE I WOKE UP  
>WITH A PICTURE OF YOU SMILING IN MY HEAD<br>INSTINCTIVELY I REACHED ACROSS THE BED  
>THE EMPTY PLACE I FOUND WAS SMOOTH AND COOL<br>LONESOME TOO

I KNOW YOU THINK THAT WE SHOULD STILL BE FRIENDS  
>BUT NOW I'M ASKING YOU TO THINK AGAIN<p>

IS THERE SOMETHING YOU CAN SAY  
>TO HELP ME MAKE YOUR MEMORY GO AWAY<br>AND EVEN THO YOUR HEART DON'T WORK THAT WAY  
>MAKE IT CRUEL AND MAKE IT STRONG<br>AND IF YOU WOULD TELL YOUR NEW LOVE  
>IM SORRY IF I WOKE HIM UP<br>I AINT TRYING TO DO HIM WRONG  
>JUST HAVING A HARD TIME MOVING ON<p>

SEE I'VE BEEN BLISTERED  
>BY THE NEVER ENDING SUNSHINE OF YOUR SMILE<br>YOU KNOW A MEMORY LIKE THAT WILL LAST A WHILE  
>BUT I HAD NO IDEA IT'D TAKE THIS LONG<br>OR BURN SO STRONG

AND EVERY TIME THAT SUN BEGINS TO SET  
>SOMETHING IN ME CRIES OUT NO NOT YET<p>

SO IS THERE SOMETHING YOU CAN SAY  
>TO HELP ME MAKE YOUR MEMORY GO AWAY<br>EVEN THO YOUR HEART DON'T WORK THIS WAY  
>MAKE IT CRUEL AND MAKE IT STRONG<br>AND IF YOU WOULD TELL YOUR NEW LOVE  
>IM SORRY IF I WOKE HIM UP<br>I DON'T INTEND TO DO HIM WRONG  
>JUST HAVING A HARD TIME MOVING ON<br>MOVING ON

IF YOU WOULD TELL YOUR NEW LOVE  
>I WISH YOU BOTH THE BEST OF LUCK<br>I AINT TRYING TO DO HIM WRONG  
>JUST HAVING A HARD TIME MOVING ON<br>I DIDN'T MEAN TO TALK SO LONG  
>JUST HAVING A HARD TIME MOVING ON<br>MOVING ON

* * *

><p><strong>Well there you have it. I hoped you liked it. All mistakes are my own. If you see any glaring ones, please let me know and I will fix them.<strong>


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